Show me how to love.

So, a few things have happened in my life recently that have caused me to question where exactly God’s path is leading me. This is especially true in my professional life. Some crazy things happened at work yesterday that left me feeling uncertain. It seems every time I think that I’m finally getting things under control, something comes out of left field. So, as I sat in my car, praying that God would give me some sort of peace or direction, this song popped into my head:

“Show me how to love
In the true meaning of the word.
Teach me to sacrifice,
Expecting nothing in return.
I want to give my life away,
Becoming more like you,
Each and every day.
My words are not enough.
Show me how to love.”

At first, I thought, “that’s weird. I haven’t thought about that song in ages.” Then I carried on with my praying. But, then I found I couldn’t stop singing it. It was stuck in my head the rest of the night. Then, it finally dawns on me that God is trying to tell me something.

This morning, I’m reading my Bible and decide to read the book of Ruth because the pastor was speaking about it on Sunday and my interest was peaked. Holy crap! Ruth was the example of that song. She chose to sacrifice her happiness completely and love Naomi, even if that meant leaving her home, her family, and her Gods. She followed Naomi to Bethlehem and was completely obedient. And, what did she get for all her trouble? A love story for the ages. She found complete fulfillment through her love of Naomi.

Now, I don’t think God was telling me that He has a love story for the ages waiting for me, but I’m hoping He’s got something up his sleeve. I think He’s telling me to rewrite my job description. It is no longer my job to teach or to discipline. It is not my job to gossip or socialize. It is my job to love those kids to the best of my ablility, through Him. And, maybe that means I might have to sacrifice that lead teacher position. But, in return, I will find fulfillment in Him, becoming more like Him every day. And, I think that’s a fair trade off. And, besides, these kids, they are not hard to love.

And, this time, I am left with only one question, “Who am I? Who am I that you would bless me so uniquely and so especially? Who am I that you would spend even one minute of your time with me?”